The Winds of Change

Standing at the crossroads between here and there, I realized only yesterday that we often are confronted with the decision between what is familiar and what is right.

As creatures of habit, we opt for what feels “normal”. The over-giving, self-abandoning behavior that landed me in a very bad place still seems somewhat comfortable, even though it has nearly always been to my detriment.

The slower, more self-considering side of me has yet to become the new normal. She struggles to be heard in the sea of my seeming generosity, when what I am really doing is trying desperately to be loved, to be the good girl, to not mess up so that maaaaybe no one will notice how incredibly flawed I really am.

Conditioning is a hard thing to undo. But it’s not impossible.

We grow every day in new ways, yielding to life’s lessons and sometimes making a big stink about them. But whether we resist or accept the winds of change, they inevitably come howling through.

And then you too may find yourself at the crossroads between here and there, asking yourself the same question of whether what you are doing is simply familiar, or truly right — for you.

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