Self-soothing is a skill we teach babies to help them fall asleep at night. It is an important thing to learn because, whether that stressed out new parent knows it or not, self-soothing is an essential, lifelong process.

Creating an inner sanctum is life-sustaining. Without a safe place to land within ourselves, we would be carried like flotsam down the river of life. We would constantly be in reaction to everything around us without the wherewithall to withstand those stressors.

Many people look outside themselves for that elusive happiness they just know is “out there”. They feverishly pursue fleeting moments of joy, only to be left empty once again.

But happiness resides within. And the only one who can fill you up is you. No amount of alcohol, nicotine or sex can do it for you.

Although we may know this to be true, we still often look to others to fill the void within ourselves. And we do need each other. As social animals, humans thrive when interconnected. Even loners need a hug every once in a while.

But if we are never able to soothe ourselves in moments of despair, we will be forever doomed to unhappiness. We have a lot more control than we realize when it comes to how we choose to live our lives. And how we choose to react to the things that happen in it.

Sometimes I am awash with remarkable waves of joy for the mere sake of being alive. It usually happens when I’m in the forest (a part of me believes I am a descendent of Snow White), but it always happens when I am alone. It is my internal altar saying hello.

Carve out time in your day to feel that True Space inside. Even five minutes of connecting with yourself can put you on the happy track. Honor your resting place where your spirit can soar and be soothed at the same time.

It is possible. It really is.