How to Tend to Your Secret Garden

We all hold secrets inside. My family makes a game out of it. It’s called the “Little Known Fact” game. So at dinner parties where the guests don’t all know each other, my mother introduces the game for everyone to play. We are called to reveal a little something about ourselves that no one at the table knows such as “I won a singing contest in Italy once,” or “I know how to tame a horse.” Playing a game like that today can be hard in the age of Facebook, Twitter and LinkedIn.

My daughter insists on keeping her face off Facebook as much as possible. It may seem strange to my US family, but she wants her privacy. And rightly so. I don’t want my neighbors knowing my business so why would I want 1,000 FB friends to know the same.

In early August my PR colleague told me not to post any more vacation photos on Facebook during my trips.

“You are there to enjoy yourself. You can tell us about it later!” And so I refrained from posting anything on Facebook at all. She was right. Enjoy it now. Share it later. That’s true Slow.

Such social media abstinence feels really good. Just because it is available to me doesn’t mean I have to share every detail of my life, my pets’ lives, or those of my children, with the world. Like the Native Americans who believed taking a photograph of someone was the equivalent of stealing their souls, it is okay to tend to your Secret Garden by yourself.

I am careful who I let in to those secret spaces inside. It’s good that way. It makes those true connections all the more sacred.

And besides, I will admit it may just help me in playing the “Little Known Fact” game a little while longer.



    September 11, 2012 at 11:36 am

    I am blown away sometimes by the amount of private information people divulge on social media sites. They think that they are cultivating friendships and sharing important information when, in reality, they are spending precious time staring at their phone/computer and isolating themselves. I am very careful what I put on these sites because I choose to tend my Secret Garden. What a wonderful eye-opening blog. Thank you!

  2. l0ve0utl0ud

    September 12, 2012 at 5:32 pm

    I deleted my FB account over 2 years and haven’t regretted it at all! I love living in the HERE and NOW, and giving my time and attention to those people who are with me, rather than those on a social media site. Keeping in touch with my friends by phone and email is much more personal than via FB comments!

    1. powerofslow

      September 13, 2012 at 6:56 am

      Yes, I am beginning to tire of Facebook myself. My clients rely on it heavily so I’m obliged to continue on in that space. I have found it rather draining.

      1. l0ve0utl0ud

        September 15, 2012 at 8:18 pm

        Yes, it FB does take away a lot of energy. I used to believe that I needed FB to keep in touch with friends, but I discovered that I was wrong. In the professional world, however, things may be different.

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